I'm a superstar!

Okay, I know audio quality is awful, but for a rookie, I think I did good! Let me know your reactions haha.

DOWNLOAD MY FIRST SINGLE!

Please do finish the whole song.

Over and Out!

Are we really fighting for acceptance?

To get my mind off over the whole break up thing, I want to post an entry that I've long kept in my thoughts, so better release it now.

I remember the first time ever reading the word bimale. It was on a local chat room on television and my brother was with me. I asked him what it was and neither of us knew the answer. Later on, I interacted with the person who apparently had his number posted as well. I asked him what it meant and he said, "silahis, lalaki may gusto sa kapwa lalaki" (Basically, it's a guy wanting a guy as well).

That same day, my vocabulary was introduced to several more terms I never thought existed. Bisexual, Tripper, Transgender, Transvestite, Discreet, Blatant, and the likes. It was a rainbow spectrum of personalities and I was having a difficult time digesting everything all at the same time.

As the year passed, I finally got my questions answered, my words strongly defined, and my mind at ease knowing that in that gray area, my entirety belongs.

But with that came conflicts, misunderstandings, and unending arguments. Some find it a disorder, others a shame. Not everyone seemed to have the open mind like I do, like we do.

I remember this great movie, wherein mutants live amongst humans. In the last part of the trilogy, a "cure" was found for the mutants. But not all of them were happy about it. Because for them, being a mutant wasn't a disease that needed treatment.

That is the kind of life homosexuals live.

We are all a part of this place we call Earth, and individuality sets us apart from other animals. The uniqueness we are endowed with is a matter of choice. The choice to whether embrace it, or the choice to hide it from shallow society cliches.

The thought of being labeled, called with derogatory terms, discriminated, is wrecking. What's worse? We are even discriminated by those who are among us. So where do we stand now? Let's ask ourselves constantly with this question: "Are we really fighting for acceptance?". If so, let us start within ourselves. For no one would believe that we want to be accepted, if the fault is committed by those who are fighting for such justice.

I have long fought for who I am, who I want to be, and the rights I should be given. Only to realize in the end, that we shouldn't be fighting to justify who we are. We are what we are, and no one could put us in a category of mavericks.

Nothing is wrong with us! There's something wrong with YOU! For not being able to understand the world's inevitable growing qualities.

Today, I have decided where all this is going, and in the end, WE are to succeed. I proudly shout and say: "BAKLA AKO! MAY REKLAMO?"

*thank you to AJ Matela for giving me the courage to put myself out there with no doubts and hesitations. Your tag line made me realize that no one could ever be in a position to define who we are.

What's the big idea?

While watching the news during dinner earlier this evening, the report was about this Taiwan Toilet Restaurant.

They serve food on what looks like a toilet bowl, the customers sit on a closed toilet, and drink on... guess what?

No, that is not a picture of a pitcher my friends, those are urinals.

Are these now the modern definitions of the words: innovation, uniqueness, and individualism? Looks as though the modern minds are diverted into the mavericks.

Here's what's bothers me. Has your GI tract ever had that nasty day that you had to take about more than 4 visits to the comfort room? That by the fourth time, the look of s**t seems but natural? Or how about the time you were hospitalized and was bedridden that you had to pee on a urinal?

Done imagining? Now put those thoughts into a crazier picture. Where your s**t and urine used to be is now replaced with yummy treats.

I don't know about you but crazy would be an understatement for this idea. Then again, it just might be me.

Let me know your thoughts!

Over and Out!

Dind! Dong! The bitch's threaded!

Just when you thought you could trust a professional to do the threading, they commit the 8th deadliest sin: BAD EYEBROWS!

Could I reiterate more that just like girls, gay guys are in a whole lot of trouble when they don't get their eyebrows shaped (okay, could I be any more superficial?).

Anyways, I just have to mention the name of their company so other gay guys could not suffer the hell I had to go through. Skin 'N Face by Dra. Nisce.

For those not from Dagupan, Dra. Nisce is like the Vicky Belo of our little province minus the liposuctions. She is known for solving your pimple problems but sadly was not able to cure my acne-infected face. And now my latest rant! How could she not have trained the ladies to do good MALE eyebrows! I mean, sure, other gay guys might have loved to get girly arcs but I for one DO NOT!

Enough ranting and let's get to my horrible picture!

Notice my depression? My emotions say SAD while my eyebrows say MAD. Damn it!

I remember specifically before we began the threading that I stated these 3 important rules:

1. Not too thin
2. Don't make an arc
3. I don't want eyebrows that looks surprised or bitchy

Was it soo hard to abide by my innocent rules? Maybe I shouldn't have worn mascara and not given her the impression that I'm gay. But hello! Gay or not these are eyebrows I can't live with till they grow out. And another thing, threaded eyebrows don't grow quickly my friends so just imagine the pain I have to go through?

But what can we do? The lady has committed the impossible (turning a gay man even gayer). In times like these I always get by with the best regimen. And that is to look on the brighter side.

Let's start!

On the bright side...

I am one step away from becoming my alter ego.

On the bright side...

I have more reasons to laugh than this girl.

On the bright side...

I can finally pull myself away from the mascara and be less gayer than I already am.

And last but not the least, On the bright side...

At least I still have eyebrows compared to that of La Lisa.

So there, that ends my misery somehow. I went into the battle field, fought with the pain of every strand pulled out, and left with a shock on my face. But who's to blame? As much as I want to blame the innocent bitch who did this to me, it was still I who wanted them threaded in the first place.

MORAL LESSON IN THIS TRAGIC STORY?

Don't let her get away the next time around!...

Over and Outch! Out!

REMCYL's ONLY tip on what to give this Christmas!

QUESTION:"What should I get my loved ones this season?"
ANSWER:"You can buy them anything, it's the thought that counts."

Okay, the question is overly asked I can't even begin to tell you how cliche it's turning out. The ironic thing is, the answer to the question is even more cliche.

The answer my dear friends is simple.

For the past years, I too had given up answering the same old question since my conscience has always outrun me by constantly reminding me that it's the thought that really counts. Come to think of it, why haven't I put these words into reality.

I mean, we've always said that the thought matters, then why haven't we thought of more thoughtful gifts. Today, we end the questioning and begin the action.

Here's my idea (well, actually, I got it by reading the PDI) to pass. Instead of giving someone a material gift, why not donate to charity in your friend's name and tell him your good deed. Send your donations to an orphanage, learn how you can help at hospitals, church, or your local community, there's an endless list of things you can do. You've made your gift meaningful, at the same time, making others feel the true meaning of the season, LOVE.

All we need is love as the old song goes, and that might have been taken for granted lately, but it's never too late. Change is inevitable so why not give it a try.

Over and Out!

At Augh!... Plastic!...

At Augh!...

I was supposed to publish this in line with my shopping for skinny jeans but it was only today that i had the patience to do it. haha

So anyways, after picking up the jeans from the rack, I've realized that I was about to purchase size 25 denim from Dickies. It's not the fact that it was 600 bucks that startled me, but the fact that I am a size 25! Seriosuly, could I be any more anorexic?! It's not funny anymore!

I mean, sure for the ladies this would be their dream waistline, but for a gay guy like me, this is certainly not in my wish list. My weight better change before the year ends or I'm really putting into consideration those weight-gain pills.

Plastic!...

As if that wasn't enough depression. The day I bought those jeans made me realize how much I hate plastics! No, we're not talking about those who friends who stab you behind your back when you're not looking. We're talking about these non-biodegradable bitches we use every single day.

Shouldn't it be about time Filipinos should reconsider these things? Why not just bring a big bag (please don't think about bringing a bayong at a mall, they're exclusive only to the market) and place all your purchases there. It puts you in a better position realizing that you don't have to throw or burn something that could ruin the environment later on.

I don't know about you, but I think it's about time we join those Celebrities campaigning against the use of plastic. Paper bags are available anyway so why not put them to good use, right?

So the next time you plan on going shopping, going to the grocery store or market, oh I don't know...maybe thinking of buying your next porn to add to your collection, don't tolerate the producers in using plastic. Spread the word and make this world plastic-free!

Over and Out!

I NEED HELP!

Okay, I know that may sound a bit too paranoid, but I realized I could only solve my number one problem if I blog about it. So here goes...

I think it's pretty obvious I've been blogging long posts for the past 2 months and I want to trim them down when they appear. I've been seeing several blogs in blogspot already having entries that are long but are shortened with the "Read more..." link.

Could anyone please help me in doing that. I would very much appreciate it.

Thank You!

Over and Out!

Delectable Edible #003: Gerry's Grill (Tuna Belly and Sizzling Sisig)

Gerry's Grill is one of the few quality restaurants here in Dagupan that caters to music lovers by having bands play as they let their customers experience fine dining. Or maybe not.

Gerry's Grill really isn't located in Dagupan since it belongs to the family of restaurants in Calasiao. Not too far though from where I live. For those unfamiliar, you can't really miss it since beside it is Jollibee and Dagupena (to be reviewed soon!).

Ambience: The place offers two choices in dining. You could either stay inside, where an AC is available, or outside where the band is playing. It's pretty weird having a band outside especially with all the rains we've been experiencing lately, and the only thing that keeps the band sheltered is a big umbrella, enough for three members and their instruments (if the band has drums then it's just wet look for them right there and then).

We decided to stay outside to get a feel of the music with the dining. Just like the band, some of the tables are also sheltered by umbrellas. I was kinda disappointed with the table we had since there's nothing I hate more than rocking tables or chairs for that matter. But anyways
, too late to move out.

Band: Augh! Could they be any more awful? I understand if they have pressure in finding bands to play every night, but trust me, they could certainly do better. Maybe it was just that night that it was bad, but to Gerry's Grill, it's about time you reconsider that trio of yours. The girl was going to church, the guy on keyboards on the other hand was going to a christening, and the guitarist was the only one dressed to perform. All in all, no coordination with the outfits, and I find it amusing how all of them somehow manage to get the lyrics all wrong (not to mention problems with their P's and F's).

Food #1: Tuna Belly

Not much to say really. The grilled belly was perfectly soft but can't make up for the flavorless dish. For no reason at all, there was way too much pepper, which can be typical for a grilled dish, but it did nothing for the fish at all. Even the presentation can't save this dish's life.

Good for one if you ask me. Enough to fill one's stomach. But we both shared of course.

Judgment: 3 out of 5 stars

Food #2: Sizzling Sisig

When we looked at the menu, oh wait! Before we get to this sisig dish, I just wanna rant comment on their menu. On several dishes, they had this sort of caption in parenthesis, such as this sizzling sisig. It was written there that it was their best seller, which to me was cliche, since every bar here in Dagupan has sisig as their best seller. Another one was the sizzling pusit if I'm not mistaken, which apparently was what made Gerry's Grill famous. I don't know about you but shouldn't dishes speak for themselves rather than the menu speaking for them? I mean, let the people be the judge for that rather than the establishment saying it. It could be true, but I need proof people! Haha

Okay, now the dish.

The serving of the sisig was enough for two if you're not too hungry. It had a very unique crunch which was surprising since I rarely get that sensation in my mouth with grilled foods. This dish goes perfect with some soy sauce which comes for free, haha. In my opinion though, order this when you're planning to drink or get drunk coz making it a part of your meal isn't a good idea.

Judgment: 2 out of 5 stars

And there you have it, Gerry's Grill! A good place for that low-key date you've been planning.

Not to mention, another good place to do some camwhoring...

Over and Out!

Just when you thought...

Just when you thought that my putting on smoky eyes was gay, I have probably done the unthinkable.

I've purchased women's apparel.

No, I didn't buy a skirt or a tube top, just ladies' skinny jeans from Dickies. Cherry invited me to go shopping and having enough money at hand, I decided to join her since I've been planning to buy one for quite some time now.

I was all prepped up and ready to go, very excited actually since I have no idea what I'm in for. Questions rattled my mind such as, "Would I get the Nicole Richie type? Or maybe just the usual ones?", you know, just silly stuffs. I mean, it's not everyday I decide to buy clothing in the girl's section, right? So just cut me some slack.

Anyways, I was able to find in the quickest way possible, the best one in Nepo's entirety, the Dickies skinny jeans.

Notice how the two pockets differ? The stitches might not be too unique, but the style got me hooked.

And who doesn't love the washed out effect? (Don't answer that)

And here's the tag just to prove to you guys that it's really Dickies GIRL

Ahh, I can't wait to try them on! Say FABULOUS!!!

Over and Out!

Episode #001: Hospital check-up

Yes, I have ventured into the unknown... Video blogging!

I've tried it out and let's see if I get good reviews on my rookie work.

Episode #001 is about the hospital trip I've been dying to go to. You'll pretty much hear me say, "Well anyways", or maybe, "...stop...", but what the heck, I think I did pretty good. I'll just do better the next time around.

Over and Out!

Just what I needed...

Yup! It's officially the day I get myself checked once again. Official time, 1:33 in the morning and I can't bring myself to shut these damn eyes.

After blogging 3 entries for my brother, I ran out of things to do so I just waited for my baby to be online in Gtalk. I was a bit worried since he wasn't replying to my text messages, but I guess he just took a break.

So anyways, worried as I could ever be about the whole check-up thing, I was suddenly taken aback from my fear with this little chat we had.

Baby: bhe, gcing ka pa (Baby, you're still awake?)
Remcyl: di ako makatulog eh, iniisip ko result bukas (I can't sleep, I'm thinking of tomorrow's results)
Baby: naku rest ka na bhe wag mo isipin un (Take a rest baby, don't think about it) anything can happen
Remcyl: what if meron ulit? (What if another clot is found?)
Baby: just think that we're here for u, nothing will change, life has its ending
Remcyl: thank you bhe, now i can sleep well knowing that... I LOVE YOU!
Baby: mawawala din tau lahat pero wag mo isipin un i love u 2 wag ka na magisip ng kung ano (All of us will leave this world but don't think about that yet. I love you too. Don't worry too much)
Remcyl: okay bhe, cge tulog na me... wag na din u magpapagod maxado ah... mwah! nytnyt my sweet angel! (Okay baby, I'll sleep now... Don't tire yourself too much... mwah! Goodnight my sweet angel!)

Aaahhh! Don't you just melt with those sweet words. In times of anxiousness such as the state I am in right now, knowing that someone special is thinking of you and cares for you is all you need to give you the sleep you need to remove that anxiety.

Thank you my dear sweet angel for all the love!

Could I be any more blessed?

Over and Out!

Me scared. . .

Okay, the reason for me not blogging even if I have all these ideas I wanna get out in my head is because I have an appointment with my neurologist tomorrow. After 3 years post-operation of nothing bad happening with my head, I've been feeling migraines, dizziness, and lightheaded lately.

Frankly you guys, I'm scared.

What if something IS wrong with my head again?

I hope not! I'm not ready to find out, but I realized just now, when could I ever be ready? This should be something I'm more than ready to face since I've been through more difficult times than this. I mean really, after my skull being opened and muscles taken out to wrap veins with, a check-up is nothing.

But I do need the biggest help from you guys, through prayers. I know we haven't shared that much yet, but I am hoping for your warm consideration to my request.

Will be updating you tomorrow as soon as I get the results with pictures of the trip and the check-up.

Over and Out!

Random thoughts: Obese jeans... Shopping... Friendly visit... To a healthier me!...

Obese Jeans...

So I had this thought for quite some time now, I just was not able to take the photos I wanted to make this entry possible. To start off, everyone probably knows by now how much I adore skinny jeans. I only have one pair and sadly, it even belongs to my sister. I can't buy one since men's skinny jeans are still not skinny enough for me that I have to purchase the ones for girls. If you happen to know a brand that caters to my size, let me know ASAP. So anyways, I've been seeing girls at the mall sporting skinny jeans fabuleux and noticed plus sized women wearing them too. But could they still be called skinny jeans if they're worn by non-skinny women?

You might be saying how rude I'm being for trying to label such simple idea, but to the contrary, I love it when plus size women wear skinny jeans for them. Voluptuousness has never been more beautifully flaunted than this. I just want to have an official name for it so we know what to call it.

So what do you think guys? Yes to obese jeans? Or still call them what they are?

Shopping...

My baby and I recently went shopping which was a big leap from the usual movie marathon and fine dining experiences. We had lots of fun trying to find the best deals in the small City mall we had to work with.

So here we go!

My baby bought these three items which were great! The polo shirts were great buys thanks to Molecules. The green number fits him perfectly and the pattern is superb, while the gray stripes with a bicollar is sooo flattering to his skin tone. Then he bought regular straight denim at Penshoppe in a dark blue hue which fits to him like silk. I'm really glad he chose this in his "right" size since most of his jeans I think are bigger. Can't wait till he tries them on.





I on the other hand only had one room for my purchase and I decided to spend it on this fabulous Bench cap. It's in this great soft fabric and the color is just soothing to my sight.

Friendly visit...

My cousins from Manila recently visited us and I forgot to post an entry about all the fun we had but anyways, better late than never, right?

This ladies and gentlemen, and to my fellow gay people, is my cousin's second son, AJ. He decided to play with the laundry basket so I tagged along with his game of Who wants to be a beekeeper.

Then here's her third son, Josh, who I took for a stroll on the beach for more than 8 laps just so he could sleep soundly. And thank God he did. With a little help from my P990i, my mission was accomplished.

Here's kuya paul trying to feed him with some Quake Cake...


To a healthier me!...

Okay, this might sound a bit childish, but I've forgotten about drinking milk daily. Calcium! Hello! I need it badly, especially because I think I'm at risk for scoliosis. So starting tonight, I add this to my nightly regimen.

Cheers to a healthier me!

Over and Out!

Is it really that big a deal?... Good photography if you ask me

Is it really that big a deal?...

The Board!

The word is just torture to my ears!

My mom and i had been arguing about the board for a couple of days now and she pulled my last string this time around.

Okay, you might be asking yourselves WTF am I talking about?

It's the board exams. What every self-confessed nursing student must go through to be a certified and registered nurse. Apparently according to her, I must have it too.

Maybe it's better if I put it into scripts.

Mom: Let's talk shall we. What are your plans?

Me: I wanna cut hair.

Mom: You just want to stay this way forever?

Me: Stay as what?

Mom: Don't you want to earn 2.8 million a year?

Me: I don't care if I earn that much or nothing at all. I find it a waste

Mom: Why would it be a waste?

Me: Why should I go through all that when I won't even practice that profession?

Mom: It's not that I am against cutting hair, but I just want you to have options.

Me: Then what is your problem with me cutting hair?
Mom: I don't know who you are anymore. I don't know what you want to do with your life

---walkout from Mom---

What's up with that?!

She left with nothing resolved. How immature!

I did the walkout thing with my friends and/or classmates before but grew out of it somehow. I've learned that the best way to handle a situation is with open communication and and open mind. I can't believe that my mom would just walk out on me like that and leave me fucked up!

First of all, I'm okay with the thought of having options in life, but hello! I gave up my passion for singing just because she wasn't okay with it, saying that it's a temporary job with no shelf life. I won't do that again to my passion for cutting hair! Never!

The thing is, the last time we've talked regarding my future, and God give me another blood clot in the head if I'm lying, she told me to just give her a degree and I can do anything I want. And now what? A degree is followed by an exam that is way too expensive that we could hardly afford?

Secondly, she keeps on saying that they could make ways in giving us that money for the review. I'm no blind, but I am fully aware of what we can afford and I'm done with them borrowing money just so they could do these things. I appreciate the effort and all, but frankly, after all the review and exam I'd be doing? What is it all for? I have, over the years, learned the value of education, but is my choice saying it isn't? Why not just spend it on something that could help me in the future with the career of my choice, right?

Lastly, I believe I am old enough to make personal decisions such as this on my own. My boyfriend has always told me that you should always fight for your beliefs especially if it's what's right, and i know THIS is what's right.

Final decision: I'm not taking that board! A stylist could never use it for anything.

Good photography if you ask me...

Here's a couple of amateur photographs I took with my Sony Ericsson P990i. Great quality I believe!





Over and Out!

Pinoy Vlogging!

I had been blogging for roughly six years now and it was always a great deal for me being a ground for enhancing my writing skills. The ability to express yourself with what you feel through reaching out to the world is a fulfilling job I have been doing. But it's more than a job, it's a part of who I am already.

I've tried doing podcasts in my previous sites and found it very interesting being able to add in music or special effects to the background. Some grasped the idea and subscribed to the entries.

But in a technologically advanced world we live in, I can't help but feel the sudden urge to vlog. Yes! Vlog! Welcome to the future a.k.a. right now! Haha

Vlog in its simplest explanation is basically blogging in a video.

Filipinos having the innate ability to learn fast isn't far behind with all these techno hoo-has. Very few are doing vlogs but are very good at what they do.

We pinoys have great ideas but somehow lack the resources to spread out such ideas and I truly believe that with the vlogging trend, we have a bigger ground to do so. Just imagine all the great vlogs pinoys could make knowing that such innovation is easily accessible!

Only a great vision could rake in more pinoys in engaging in vlogging and we are so lucky that with the great leadership of Coy from Cavite, this possibility isn't far from becoming a reality.

With that said, I know there's no harm in trying it out. watch out for my first vlog you guys!

Over and Out!

It's not funny anymore!

Cherry (a good friend of mine) and I had an amateur photo shoot in my grandmother's house and this photo scared me to death!

The theme of the shoot was supposed to be about the skinny jeans, but reality was the only theme I got. Frightening as it sounds, reality is not looking so good.

My boyfriend has always been serious in telling me I'm super skinny but I never considered it a serious thing since all I could think of blaming are my genes. Everyone in my family's thin, but of course not as emaciated as I am so I considered myself normal.



But looking at this picture, knowing I only weigh 48 kilograms being 5'9" in height, and noticing my hair is drying (not because of the daily torture from styling), only a moron would consider me normal.

When I was able to fit into the skinny jeans I was wearing in the shoot, I had smiles up to my ears. Who knew I could fit into a 27! But now, it's not funny anymore! Seriously!

The world should be focusing more on healthy lifestyles! Hard to be hit with this reality, but everywhere you try to eat is inviting you to unhealthy meals; everywhere you turn, a store loaded with cigarettes allows minors to purchase such dangerous sticks; and no one seems to be making a big deal out of the possible accidents or violence to be caused by alcohol.

A voice is carried out, but more should be heard!

I have a check-up with one of my neurologists in Sta. Mesa this coming November 9 and frankly, I'm terrified. So terrified that it's the first time I cried about such thought. Scared that they might find another clot in my brain and I have to go in for another surgery. The last one was traumatizing enough, I don't need another one.

Then I had a thought. Why not be as brave as I've been on the first surgery I've had where no nerves attacked me at all. The absence of fear surprised most of my family since I had always been the drama king queen. Then I realized. The fear was not from knowing that something is present again and that I have to go through another surgery, it was from knowing how others feel about it and how devastated they would be.

I mean, sure, they've told me about how every step of the way went during the first one. From how I've collapsed naked in bathrooms twice in two different occasions, to sending me to Manila in an Ambulance from Dagupan, and up to the part where I exited the operating room after 19 hours of surgery. But knowing that now, makes me feel for those people. Not to mention, I have my boyfriend to think about which I fear most. I've always made it a point not to hurt him, and with him knowing about it, I know it would break his heart.


Why is that only when our health is at stake do we take preventive measures? Why didn't we listen to the good ol' saying, "An ounce of prevention is better than an ounce of cure"?

So I think the best way to deal with this is by having a list! Having your to-do's jotted down and knowing which is accomplished is very effective for me. So here's my health list:

1. By January '08, I should weigh more than 55 kg. Just a little trivia, from the time I was born, I never surpassed 48kg.

2. No smoking, No alcohol, and No drugs

3. More sleep! I've heard once on television that you really don't need 8 hours of sleep. It's the quality of the sleep that should be tested and not the quantity. By 11pm, I should be asleep (examination week exempted).

There! 3 should be fine for now. I think keeping these three going could save me from Php800,000 worth of surgery for the next 50 years.

If I have learned anything from this experience, aside from the fact that anorexic models like moi should never be doing such shoots ever again, is to never take your health for granted. If you have the resources to stay healthy, then take action, it could save your life.

Looking forward to a healthier me and you!

Over and Out!

For my one true miracle:

I've always kept spoken or written words said to me by my baby private, but I just have to share to the world the text message he sent me last night:

Happy 6th monthsary bhe! Thanks for being so kind to me and for changing for the better. Bawasan mo lang pagkarisky mo sa health ha. be cautious. Anyway, you've changed a lot for just 6 months. I am proud of you. Love you my angel! Pataba ka nga kasi payat payat mo na. Hehe Rest well and eat well ok.

I love you my angel! And nothing in this world could ever separate us! Mwah!

Over and Out!